When God Breaks Your Heart for What Breaks His

“Wednesday evening was by far my favorite of them all, we went to a this place called The Bridge, while we were there our job was to serve the homeless people their food and sit them down in their chairs and converse with them.

It is hard for me to talk to people I don’t know, because I can barely talk to the people that I do know without feeling awkward or left out because I don’t know what to say.

Once we got to The Bridge I was not sure where to go or what to do first because even the leaders weren’t sure. Once I saw all of the people that showed up I felt like crying. I can’t fully explain why because I don’t even know, but seeing all of those homeless people or people who just don’t have enough money to buy their own food, moved me to tears a multitude of times.

Two people shared their testimonies and I was attentive through both of them because I was so interested in their backstories and how they have gotten to this point in their life. I continued to cry off and on all night long, but I tried to hold it back so no one could tell especially the people standing in front of me.

Then while the praise band was singing I looked over to my right and I saw a woman standing up with her hands lifted high praising God amongst all of the other people that were sitting down and it was amazing to see someone so happy to praise God and it really touched my heart.

I felt like I wanted to cry again.

I still didn’t know why maybe it was the environment, or maybe it was that I was seeing so many people that were dirty and hungry and had holes in their clothes and it was a lot different than what I was used to. 

Once we got back to New Life Baptist I wanted to talk to someone who I love to talk to and is like my mentor, but so much more. He tells me that there is more to me than I can see and that he sees me doing good things in my future which makes me feel good because I don’t know what to expect in my future. He said that it was the Holy Spirit inside of me that was making me cry and it sometimes makes people cry or laugh uncontrollably.

The Holy Spirit was moving me to tears to soften my heart and make me cry because a lot of things have happened to me in the past few months, but I find it hard to cry and crying to me feels like the best thing ever when you have a lot of feelings to let go of.

The whole experience was really hard for me to take in all at once. All of the people that came to get food and sit in for worship and the testimonies they all had something different about them; they all had different backstories and reasons of how they had come to be at the place that they are in their life now.

Nobody ever has the same struggles, nobody has the same life, nobody has to lead the life they lead, and nobody that was there ever could have imagined that they would ever be where they are now in life, but every time a person like me goes on a mission trip and comes to a simple bridge to feed some homeless or troubled people a big change happens that we may not see so well.

You can change the life of one person just by walking to their chair with them with their food and asking them how their day was and praying for them; I saw going to The Bridge as a small thing that we where do that didn’t seem like it would do that much good. But seeing the smiles on all of their faces just made me melt inside it made my heart soften like it should be, it made me feel genuinely good.

That was like a cleansing of my heart and like a spiritual awakening I could go on and on about how it made me feel to be there, but I know that I want missions and service no matter what type to be a part of my life forever and when you feel like you need to cry and you don’t know why like me, it’s the Holy Spirit coming in to you and you should always accept it no matter what and you should show love because you’ve been shown love.”